Sometimes, we become overwhelmed with the challenges of raising our children as happy, successful, and responsible human beings. We continuously struggle to mold them as a good citizen for whom we can take pride. But one important thing we forget that just changing some of our behaviors and breaking some of our bad habits, we can contribute remarkably to our children’s upbringing. Nobody is perfect in the world, but all of us need a certain level of self-evaluation as a parent. Are my actions capable of building trust and earning influence? Am I doing the right things to instill a positive attitude in my child? The behaviors we project to our children bounce back to us one day. So, as parents, we must recognize our bad habits and behaviors and work hard to eliminate them.
5 BAD HABITS EVERY PARENT NEEDS TO QUIT:
1. MINDLESS USE OF SMARTPHONES:
Several recent pieces of research have shown that the most damaging parenting habit is getting distracted with smartphones while being present physically with the children. Children feel unimportant when parents remain absorbed in their phones during family time and get irritated when interrupted. Sometimes, we promise our kids to play their favorite board games or watch movies together, but end up with attending a call or checking social media updates. This creates a negative impact on the social and emotional development of the young ones.
We become inattentive to our children when we are on our cell phones and pay less effort to solve their problems. Sometimes, we don’t listen to them carefully and jump to a solution. This kind of behavior disrupts proper brain development in children and makes the parents less reliable to their children. In addition to this, children, whose parents especially mothers remain absorbed in their smartphones, become demotivated to explore new things.
2. JUDGING OR CRITICIZING OTHERS:
Judging other parents and making derogatory comments about them in front of a child is a bad habit every parent should quit. Badmouthing someone the child loves, be it a family member or a teacher or anybody else, can ruin a parent’s image. Eventually, the kid will be grown as judgemental and disrespectful to the parents as well as others. We have to let them grow their own sense of right and wrong.
To raise a kind, compassionate, and responsible human being, we should never underestimate others in front of our children. Everyone has his own struggle that may not be the same as others. So, judging others for everything displays our negative attitude and irresponsibility only. We should allow our children to enjoy every relation according to their own terms. To instill a positive attitude towards life, we should teach compassion and gratefulness to our children by practicing them ourselves.
Besides, parents should break the habit of scrutinizing every mistake of their children. If we always criticize our children instead of praising their little successes, it damages their self-confidence.
3. THE HABIT OF PROCRASTINATING:
Parents should give up the habit of procrastination to raise an organized child. When parents continuously push off the deadlines to do something, children consider it natural to do so. They also adopt the habit of pushing off daily chores and responsibilities. They start thinking that there is nothing wrong to put things off and not getting things completed in time. In this way, they never feel motivated to follow a time table strictly and consequently receive lower grades in school. An unorganized and demotivated child can not achieve great things in life. On the other hand, parents who procrastinate with their responsibilities, fail to solve their children’s problems successfully. They even fail to attend their queries timely.
Rigidity of parents can be an obstacle to a happy parent-children bonding. Many of us cannot acknowledge our mistakes and take the necessary steps to sort that out. This type of mentality provokes us to follow an authoritative parenting style where there is no scope for discussion with children. Children are expected to follow the rules of parents without any questions in this parenting style.
But we have to be open-minded to accept suggestions from others or able to appreciate and analyze other’s opinions. Sometimes, children come out with some excellent ideas that adults cannot think about. So, parents have to come out of their egos and see new things with a new perspective. We have to admit our mistakes and apologize. Parents have to be resilient to positive changes for the well being of their young ones. This kind of approach can help our children to grow as happy, and responsible adults.
A child’s character gets shaped by the way his parents react in certain situations. Regulating our anger and frustration by overreacting can harm any relationship. People who overreact generally vent their anger by yelling to others even to the children. Yelling makes a child aggressive, and as a grown-up, he also takes the help of yelling to vent out anger and frustration. Research has proved that parents who get angry easily and overreact have children who throw a lot of tantrums. They nurture negative emotions within and become upset easily. So, it is very much important for parents to learn emotion regulation to modify their children’s behavior.
As we are the role models for our children, we should be very much careful about our habits and behaviors. Instead of correcting our children or telling them what to do every now and then, we should let them influenced by our positive attitude. To raise happy, successful, and responsible human beings we need to break the bad habits that can hold us back from being our best selves.